Project for someone I care about...

Well… even with these strange feelings for another person, I feel like I had to leave my feelings of her behind. I’m not going to be a fool and interrupt her interest in this other guy; he sounds like a good match for her, as she told me everything on the phone the other night. She probably didn’t have a clue about my short feelings for her, but it’s alright. Friday will be strange having dinner with her and two other friends…

I was working on this clay project for someone special but I decided to stop once I figured out that I liked someone else, which I mentioned above. I was always told that making something for someone you like or care about is better than buying something for that person because you are making it with all your heart and soul. While I was making the base of my clay project, I couldn’t help to think about who I was making this for. Tears would run down my face but I couldn’t do much to wipe them away because my hands were covered in clay, as I continued to think of her. The base was as far as I got… The project is a similar craft that I made for Raythe about five years ago (my ceramic skills have changed since then). It was a beach setting with two palm trees and a sun rising up. I wanted to do a similar project because it was one of my unique creations. Raythe has the sun; the other person will have the crescent moon. I actually don’t have any pictures of my old creation and it would be a pain to ask Raythe; I never asked her what she did with things I gave her or made her, knowing my project was good for putting trash change on. But whatever, I might continue working… I’m such a fool for her.

Today is actually the day Raythe and I got together so many years ago. I randomly get images and flashbacks of my past. I try to nap them away but in my dreams, they replay events. I decided to flip through some pictures of us… What a bad idea that was. Endless tears would just drop on my desk… What can I say? I still love her? That sometimes I wish I could be back with her? But I know that’s physically impossible. Happy anniversary that never happened.

//zeron